Protected: Green Eyed Monster

Issues & Pictures

Several things I’m thinking about this week:

• How to manage the busyness of my life without going of my diet.  This has always been my struggle.  Today, I worked in my classroom (and was interrupted 20,000 times) until almost 1:30.  So caught up in things that I absolutely forgot to eat.  I brought my lunch.  It was a really good lunch:  salad, roasted veggies, pork chop & apple.  Well, I had to go right away to the dentist.  I was STARVING when I left the dentist.  And the fast food was pretty tempting.   I don’t know how I resisted.  I came home and cooked:  salmon, wilted spinach & onions and cabbage.  It was good but after it was over, I was still hungry.
• Today, I didn’t get anything done.  Other teachers, kept coming by to say hello and welcome back and to check out my classroom’s new setup.    Also, I’ve been helping the new SS teacher.  With all of that action, anything I started never got completed.  I sat at the computer several times to only be interrupted.  *sigh*  How will I ever get finished with my lesson plans and ancillaries by Monday!?  I’ve decided tomorrow that the lights are going off, the door will close and lock and I’ll work until my stuff is ready!
• The FlyLady is really working for me.  My home is CLEAN, CLEAN, CLEAN!  Oh, yeah!  Everyday, I spend 15 minutes picking up and prepping for the next day.  It is working-even on this school schedule.  Yes, I am beat tired when I get home, but I make myself do it.  And it feels good.  You know, she has a FlyLady plan for teachers???
• I am so excited to be returning to my school this fall.  I never thought I could be this optimistic, but I am.  Thank you, Lord for such a positive attitude.    I haven’t felt this good about school in a long time.   Here are pictures of what my classroom looks like right now:

Miss Teacha the Artist!

I had planned to visit my mother this summer, but when I couldn’t get a plane ticket price to match a good time for me to go.  I decided that I would stay home this summer season.  I would truly rest and do some touristy things in my city.   Remember, boredom is good motivation for teachers that pays off during the school year.

So, yesterday, I facebooked that I was bored.   I wrote that I was tired of tv, movies and starbucks-I needed something NEW to do.   A friend wrote back about this paint class.  Basically in 2 – 3 hours, she teaches you to paint a masterpiece.  I watched some of the news clips of her and you she keep saying no art skills were required at all!  And I have none- my students laugh at my map drawing, so I know I’m not any good.  On her website, it said that all of her seats for last night were booked.  I told her to email me in case of any last minute cancelations.  About an hour before the class, she emailed me and said I could come.

I had a FABULOUS time.  I have never painted anything in my life outside of kindergarten scribbles and that was over 25 years ago!  Here is my work.  It is titled “My City Music”

So afterward, I had an idea.  My kids would love to do something like this.  How could I incorporate painting into my classroom?  Into history?  What if I could write a grant and she could come do this at my school with my students?  We have art teachers at my school.  How could I collaborate with them to do something like this?  What unit would it go with? the Renaissance era?  How would I make connections?   On their own, my students would never be exposed to something like this-remember I am the grown version of them.   This would be an awesome adventure and cultural awakening for them.

Lifestyle Change

So, I felt a sinus infection coming on a couple days ago.  To prevent it from being severe, I called the doctor’s office and asked for a refill of my sinus meds.  When the nurse called me back, he said “Your blood pressure was up the last time your were in.  The doctor would like to see you before she refills your prescription.”  I promised to be there in 45 minutes.  I was seen  pretty quickly.  The nurse took all of my vitals and drew some blood.  And I began the waiting game. . . . took pictures of my eyebrows, facebooked until I was bored . . .etc.

When the doctor comes in, she tell me that my blood pressure was 142/92.  She says its too high and explains blood pressure mumbo jumbo to me.  And goes back through my file to read to me some of the previous notes on my bp.  Apparently, I’ve always had blood pressure on the low end–pretty shocking for someone my size.  Wasn’t an issue until this past December when my blood pressure read 160/97.   She though it was a fluke . . .maybe something had happened that day or I didn’t get enough rest that night.  So, she wasn’t alarmed in December.  Now, in May, the Doctor is alarmed at my elevated numbers.

We talked about different things. . . when I saw her in December, I asked for anxiety medication.  I told her that I was stressed and suffering with a little winter blues.  She gave me a few magic pills and told me to check back in.  The magic pills gave me stomach cramps that were not worth the faux happiness !  After a week or two, I quit taking them and put them in the garbage.  In December, I had been staying up and getting up early to prep for school.  I was tired.  I was stressed out and just plain miserable.  Remember I was teaching 2 new courses . . .one of which was an AP Course, (the other Co-Teacher supplied most of the materials, but I still had to teach it) planning period every other day and meetings one of those planning periods.  It was too much work to do, too little time and I was flat out exhausted!!!

Second semester has been better because I taught AAH and because I’ve been teaching it for 3 years, I have it DOWN!  But its still 3 preps.. . .approx 185 students.  And an AP class that I planned and studied for AT HOME!  Wrapping up the school year has been crazy because students were still turning in make up work on exam days (according to our willy nilly policy, I have to accept it–of course, I threw it away.  Didn’t even look at it!).  I fell off the wagon with Weight Watchers because when I got home, I didn’t want to cook and I started eating out again. . . .its just a vicious cycle:  stress, eat, stress, exhausted, stress, the blues

As the doctor and I talked, I came to the realization that my school district has made me sick–literally.  My doctor says, “I think its too early to put you on BP meds.  I’d like to watch it for a little while.  You need to record your BP everyday for the next couple of weeks.”  And then she began discussing new meds to handle the anxiety/stress.  Finally, she says, “Miss Teacha, I really need you to make some lifestyle changes.”

“Lifestyle changes?” I respond.

“Eating less salt, diet, exercise, find ways to handle your stress.”

Hmph, I thought to myself, that is how I handle my stress.  A big piece of chocolate cake.

“Look I can’t give you the meds you want because they might give you a stroke.  You will have to suffer through this infection with over the counter stuff and some fexofenadine.  We’ll just be treating the symptoms.”

I sigh. . . and I listen to all the instructions about the meds she’s giving me that WON’T help my sinus infection.  By the time I got out to the car.  I made the decision to go home put on my bathing suit and start my lifestyle changes.

Protected: Personal: My feelings were hurt

Protected: Something New: Interracial Dating

Mmmmm . . .

For the past week, a typical day has looked like this:

1. Get up at 4 am
2. Take a shower to wake up.  Get dressed.
3. Study/plan for my AP class.
4. Leave for school at 630
5. Teach all day.  Planning period every other day.  Some days there are no breaks for me except for lunch, which isn’t until 12:15.  Because the scheduling was so bad this year,  I have leave my students alone so I can make a run for the “facilities”.
6. Stay at school until 4 PM or 5 PM to help students with projects, tutor, discuss progress.
7. Arrive home around 530 PM.  Gather dinner, dibble dabble on facebook, chat with a friend or two for minute, watch a little TV
8. Sleep at 7 PM -  8PM

I haven’t blogged or thought about reading blogs at all until yesterday.  I don’t have time and when I get home I am absolutely too wiped out to comprehend what anyone is saying.  One of my status messages this week read:  ” I feel like a first year teacher.”  Its true. . . none of my lessons are exciting or fun or blogworthy.  I haven’t even kept up my classroom site.  The librarian asked me about blogging . . . I just thought, when is there ever any time?  She has time b/c she doesn’t have to teach 7 classes.  . .my bad, I said I wasn’t going complain.

I’m supposed to be coordinating the Black History Month activities at my school.   Only thing I have done:  contacted an organization about a guest speaker.   Besides that, zip, zap, zilch!

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Someone asked to see a picture of my new hairdo. It takes some getting used to, but I’m like it more and more everyday.  And I love the fact that I’m not put chemicals on my scalp that could hurt me in the future.

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I am struggling at school to diversify instruction this year with my AP kids.  Yesterday, I was lecturing and I know it was terrible b/c I could see the looks on their faces.  It was absolutely HORRIBLE.  K suggested taking more of a discussion approach.  I’m going to try that next week.    Here is how I plan to structure it.

• Pose a question.
• Students discuss answers to the question.
• Guide students to the correct answer based on the reading.
• Provide with structured notes at the end of each question via PPT.

I’ve never tried this approach before, but I’ve never lectured this much before.  My kids in the past were always doing something, creating something. . . but, i feel like there is soooo much content to cover along with AP writing skills.  Thanks, K for the ideas. A totally new learning experience for me. Hopefully, this will help my students.  But it means more time prepping.

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My personal life is in the dumps.  My friendship with my BFF has ended.  Long story short, I made plans with her and then canceled her at the last minute to go do something else with someone else. Never told her why I canceled.  However, I posted the pictures on facebook. Didn’t think anything of it b/c it was me hanging out with friends.  Apparently, this makes me a bad friend.  BFF was angry.   I didn’t think it was a big deal b/c my plans with her were never solid–It was like “oooh, lets do something tomorrow,” my response, “ok, yeah”.  So, when this other thing came up I went for it.  She has done it to me.  She has stood me up b/c she was shopping for make-up, but my canceling was the last straw in the hat. It feels like high school all over again.

I want out of the friggin city.  I need a new start.

Good Hair

When Chris Rock comes out with a new movie, he tours all of the major television shows to promote it.  He “gotta” make some money, so he “gotta” promote his movie.  I can’t until it comes to my city.

Well, all the hoopla about perms and relaxers and such got me thinking. . . . I’ve been talking about it for weeks.  I started letting my natural hair come in over the summer.  I haven’t had a relaxer sense June.  I was tired of working with the hair; it was becoming frustrating  . . .taking hours to style and then it wouldn’t last.  So, yesterday, October 10, 2009, I chopped all of my hair off.  It is an inch long.  AN INCH LONG!!!

Today, I still don’t know if I’m happy with it.  I definitely look fatter.  Like my hair hid the fat anyway.  I feel like I have lost some of my femininity.  I don’t know if I’m comfortable with it.  I don’t hate it.  I don’t love it either.  I don’t think I adequately prepared myself for this transformation.

My mother told me to get a wig.

Again, I’m beginning to question everything I grew up learning (cultural knowledge).  Shouldn’t I have done this in college?  Why, now?

Eating Better

I think I’ve finally figured out how to eat better.  During the school year, my eating usually results in a weight gain b/c I eat out 4-7 days a week.  I don’t feel like cooking when I get home.  At all.  Who wants to cook after being on their feet for 7 hours? I don’t want to see dirty dishes in the sink.   And it is just me!  And cooking takes longer than 30 minutes, Rachel! (Personally, I’ve never made one her meals that took only 30 minutes unless part of it was already prepped-think about it, her veggies have been washed and prepped, etc) Personally, I’d like to pop something in the microwave while I pick up the house and then plop it on plate.

So here is what happened, a few weeks ago I made a Baked Ziti.  I ended up with a casserole dish full of ziti (b/c I don’t know how to cook on a small scale).   Also, I can’t stand eating the same thing several days in a row-1 or 2 days, I’m fine, but 3 or 4, nope. Usually, it sits in the frig until I throw it away.  Well,  I had enough ziti for a week . . .so I did something I really never really done before:  I cut it up, put it in quart size zip lock bags and put it in the freezer, individual servings ready to go.  I thought, “man, this will be like that bag of chicken with freezer burn on it, that has been here for 2 years.”

Yesterday, we had a storm.  One of those storms where the weather man won’t get off the news.  Therefore, I wasn’t able to go and pick anything up or go to the grocery.  After spending the entire afternoon in my classroom, I didn’t want to cook.  So, I pull out one of those zip lock bags of ziti and a bag of brussel sprouts.  I take the brussel sprouts and put them in zip lock back with 1/2 a tsp of garlic seasoning, shake it up, take a fork a poke a hole in the zip lock bag. Use same fork to poke a whole in the bag of ziti.  Stick them both in the microwave on for 5 minutes. . . turn it on again for another 2 minutes.  By the time the bell dings the second time, my glass of wine water is ready.  I dump the ziti and sprouts onto a plate.  Zip lock bags hit the trash can.  Wham, dinner is ready.  Yumm-o! (thanks Rachel).

This morning (at 4 am, can’t sleep when I’m crazy emotional),  I’m watching a DVRed episode of Rachel Ray.  She says, “you can make double of these onions and put them in zip lock bags and have them ready to top other dishes.”  A light bulb goes off!!!! Ding! Ding!!! Ding!!!

I can do this during the school year. I can make casseroles/dishes and freeze them on the weekends.  You know like make 2 or 3 different ones on Saturday.  Cut em up the next day, label them and put them in the freezer.  And I always have frozen veggies in the freezer!!!!  I can do this.  Maybe, I’ll get to the place where there about 10 different choices in there. . .b/c I like choices.  That is one of the main reasons I like eating out. . . I don’t have to eat the same thing 2 nights in a row.  That doesn’t seem so difficult.

Who knew that dinner could be so easy?  Why didn’t ya’ll tell me?  Blogger friends?   Dinner problem during the school year is now SOLVED!!!!

Reflections on Houston

I really loved Houston. Here is what I’ve been thinking about my experience as whole.

• I felt the same warmth and welcome spirit as I experience here.  .  . I held conversations with the shuttle operators almost every morning, definitely a southern hospitality thing.  Folks are definitely approachable and friendly and helpful in Houston.
• Houston seemed city-like (the hustle & bustle, turnabouts & lots of activity and things to do), but still “slow” enough for the likes of me
• It seems as though Texas as a state really invests in education.  They take education seriously.  Maybe, I’ve only heard the good, but I saw David’s school up close.  I listened to conversation from my classmates.  And I’ve seen pictures of Kary’s school.  Education, specifically, social studies, is taken very seriously in Texas
• The food is good.  Good food is always a perk.  (Although, my “therapist” might disagree).   My experience with TexMex rocked.
• The cost of living is comparable to where I live now.  I know that I could make ends meet and enjoy a similar standard of living.

Concerns/Questions left after leaving:

• Houstonians drive worse than the people here!  They are speed racers and very aggressive. The roads are crazy bumpy. Would Goldie (my car) be able to handle it?  But I haven’t looked into the accident rates and numbers there . . .maybe I would fit in pretty good with the drivers there, remember, I have had 4 accidents w/in one year’s time. *sigh*
• How easy would it be for me to assimilate and make friends?  I read a quote the other day that said something like, “to have friends, one must first be a friend.”  I’m definitely learning how to just put myself out there to meet people.  In Texas, I’d have to let the shyness go to really make it my home.  There may even be some single men down there. . . .yaahooo!!!
• I need to check out the Dallas metro area before I make any decisions.   The people who came up from Dallas were interesting and I’d like to know more about that city.  I made a great friend who teaches at an all girl charter school down there.  She was amazing and everything she told me about her school was fantastic.  She took my card and we traded info.  Her school is still fairly new but as they expand they are going to have a need for more teachers.
• The competitive nature of teacher jobs there.   Is it highly competitive?  Would my TX certification need to be complete before I could accept/be offered a job there?  What should I begin doing to make myself marketable and attractive to potential employers?
• Texas/American Pride!  OMG, Texans are extremely patriotic.  They love their country and their state.  I heard over and over from people things like:  Would not want to live any where else.  They also recite the state pledge EVERY SINGLE DAY in the schools.   Long time readers of this blog definitely know, I have twisted feelings about this country.  I love it and hate it at the same time.  Could I make it down there with my liberal ideology?

There are definitely a lot of things that I need to think about,but I know I’m ready to move on.  And I hate to leave my students here and I dread giving up AAH, but I think this is all for the best.

I wanted to share some of my pictures from David’s school, but it was taking to much time to upload them individually. (You can check out the album here, with mine and David’s comments)  OMG, it is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my life.  I would give my right arm to teach there.  It seems like an absolutely wonderful place.  They embrace technology.  Student population is diverse.  And they value Social Studies (they don’t seem like the poor, mistreated step-children, although that works in my favor here.)

A lot of big decisions to make in my future.  I’ll blog more about strategies tomorrow.

Time to make a change

I just watch a video on YouTube about the lapband surgery.  It’s not an option anymore, I can’t do it. After watching I sent a text to one of my friends, it said “I’m just going to have to work harder.”  Everything in life that is worth having requires work.

• I go to work and invest all of that energy for a desired result of teaching & helping students  & a check.
• Getting my degree was a lot of work. I lot time spent studying.

Everything I love, I have gotten through work.  It is a blessing to work.  So, I’ve got work to do.

Over the course of the next year, I think there will be a lot of changes in my life.  I will be leaving my city.  I WILL lose this weight.   I’m changing my hair.  I’ll be teaching an AP course for the first time.   I think it will be a challenging year.  But I know I can do it b/c I want to change who I am.

Protected: What is normal?

Protected: Therapy: My heart

Protected: The Plan (Personal)

Protected: Therapy: Why missed church

Bloggin’ Personal decision

So, I’ve given this a lot of thought-bloggin about personal issues, thoughts, just the general craziness that exists in my life in conjunction with my professional development.  What helped me to make this decision was MMT’s comment:

Aren’t you a teacher even when you’re “off duty”? Aren’t you a human being even in the classroom? Why try to separate yourself into little pieces? You are who you are–all of you! And I’m glad to read of your struggles in and triumphs in ALL parts of your life!

I’ve decided that I will password protect those posts.  So, now there will be 3 categories of posts on this blog.

• School/Academic–teaching strategies, classroom management discussions, lesson plans, funny stories etc.
• VENTs-stuff that went on at school (the current password will work for this stuff)  Remember, these are just expressions. . . no solutions needed.
• Therapy-stuff going on in my personal life:  weight, dating, debt management. . . probably, a lot of stuff about weight.  (this will have a separate password)

This will be how I compartmentalize my life. . . so that the general focus is still my teaching life; however, I’ll get an opportunity to express the total me.

Protected: Always let me down (Personal)

Protected: Blogging Therapy: Weight Issue

Protected: I did it!

Protected: What a day!